Sorry to everyone. I have had an uneventful, yet busy last couple of weeks. I honestly have had no initiative to do anything. My favorite things are to sleep and eat.
Well, I found out that I was right and it IS a GIRL! A beautiful little girl, at that. Two weeks ago, we went to see my specialist and everything looked good. The problems hadn't gone down, but they weren't growing. Yesterday though, we went and the edema, which is the swelling of fluid under her skin, is getting really bad. It makes me sick even looking at her ultrasound pictures. I hurt for her. They gave me the results from my amnio...she has Turner's syndrome.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Turners_syndrome
It broke my heart. This is not the worse case scenario but I would do ANYTHING for this edema and the cysts to go away. The Turners is liveable, but the cysts and the edema can cause her organs not to grow correctly.
I have decided that school is too stressful for me at this time...and I honestly want to think about baby girl as much as I can before it is too late. It may be stupid of me, but I don't care. I just want to be with my baby.
As far as Arnold goes, there is no way that we are getting back together. I need to move on. With the little one, he is excited, but he knows it doesn't look good. All I can think about is IF she passes away, will he ever remember her? Am I the one to be going to be the only one with her in my mind?
Ahhhh. This is too much. I will try to update more later.
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Oh Cally, I'm so sorry things are so hard, and I do not think you're stupid for putting school on hold for now. I think I would do the same thing, your baby girl needs you, and she should be your top priority. ((((Hugs)))) to you! I'm praying for you and baby girl!
ReplyDeleteCally, this is "Expecting1ST" from SK, you have been so strong through all of this and it's ok to want to focus all of your energy on your baby girl. Just remember that you are special enough to be her mom and be thankful that you have this time with her. I know it's hard to always look on the bright side when things get tough and scary. Remember your baby everyday that she is here with you. You can be sad later. I started a journal for my baby. I write down all the little things that I want to remember about my pregnancy and how much I already love this little one growing inside me. It helps me feel connected to my baby. And if you haven't already, check out the video "100 balloons" on youtube.
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